بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
22/1/1439H
Some mothers do not know how to answer their children's questions. The children may ask questions related to Aqeedah, but because many mothers are ignorant, they may give answers which end up corrupting their child's belief.
As a mother or teacher, what characteristics should you have?
1) Taqwa of Allah
You should fear Allah and fear the meeting with Him and the accounting on the Day of Judgement. Fear makes a person keen to take advantage of situations to talk about Allah to children, to notice the reaction of children during situations, to not neglect their hearts and souls. And Allah is watching your keenness and what is in your heart.
As for the one who doesn't fear Allah, he will say: Don't talk too much, don't ask many questions, sleep early because you have school, etc. and that's all. He does not take advantage of the situations he goes through to teach his children about their Lord. This is the person who is heedless of Allah.
The problem with many parents are their priorities; they do not know the most important from the least important.
E.g. Mothers are worried that their son or daughter are not able to write or read but are not worried that they do not know about Allah.
E.g. Children are asked to colour the name الله. They may ask what it means. Teachers say later, later, tomorrow you will know. Although this is a great chance to tell them. Children don't need long stories, just simple concise answers. Allah brought the chance for the mother or teacher yet she did not take advantage of that.
This is applied not just for the children who are young, but teenagers as well.
2) You should observe little ones.
This observation will lead you to know what Allah has bestowed your children of characteristics, talents, abilities, Fitrah, etc. Do not look at children as if they do not know anything. They are jewels given by Allah to you.
Children are given sound Fitrah (natural disposition). They know how to distinguish right from wrong, although they do not know how to express it. A 10 month old baby sees someone hitting another and he cries. He can't say stop, but he cries, expressing his objection to this oppression. The problem is that we do not know how to deal with children. The more you observe your children the more you will see what Allah has given them.
Today your children hear one word from you, tomorrow they will repeat the same word in the same situation. You see children who are one or two bowing and prostrating without anyone teaching them. They are ready to accept. During this age they just observe, and whatever they see is sealed in their hearts. They will never forget it until they die. You have to be very careful with your behaviour in front of your children and the words you utter in front of them. The elderly always remember the times when they were children. They remember their fathers reciting Quran, praying at night, what their mothers used to tell them, etc. So let your children have good memories and do not expose them to evil things.
This is why it is not recommended to take your children to disbelieving countries because they will see things which you as an adult may not give heed to, but it affects them. Do not expose your trust to the means of corruption.
3) Knowledge
Parents should give importance to knowledge, because Allah forbade us in the Qur'an from talking about Him without knowledge. Whenever you teach your children anything about Allah, do not invent anything from your own mind. If you do not know the answer to a particular matter, do not invent an answer or be embarrassed, say I don't know and find the answer with your child in the Qur'an.
E.g. The child asks: How did I come to this life?
Because the mother is embarrassed, she answers with an incorrect answer, and does not understand that what she is saying is a lie against Allah. You can answer this question by simply saying, "Allah created you in my womb."
Children will accept that answer with satisfication. On top of that, the nature of children is to build up their thoughts on your answer. If you give them a wrong answer, they will build up their thoughts on that. They may either continue to, or later on in life come to know the truth. The problem though is with children who are smart and come to conclusions on their own. When they figure out that you lied, they will have no trust in what you say after. Everything you tell them after that will be demolished because of your own wrong statement. So be careful with your answers. If you don't know, say you do not know. If you know, tell children the truth in simple words.
4) Know that children have special ways of asking.
There are some children who ask directly. And they may surprise you with questions. And there are others who ask questions indirectly, and you need to think about what they are trying to get at.
5) Whenever your children come with questions, ask Allah to guide you to the right words.
Many parents know the right answers, but don't know how to express it in words. Ask Allah for الهداية (guidance). Say:
Comments
Post a Comment