بِسْم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Teaching children isn't a difficult task at all. Allah granted us children who are gifted with all the tools which make it easy for them to accept divine teachings. They're like a blank page, all you have to do is write on it. And whatever you write on that page will remain until the end of their lives.
The easiest age to teach is from 3-9.
What did Allah gift children? الفطرة - A sound natural disposition
The فطرة is composed of three main things:
1) المسلّمات
These are things your child accepts without dispute.
-> Every event and action has a doer.
When you enter your room and see your furniture moved, the first question you'll ask is, "Who did that?"
-> The attribute of the action indicates the attribute of the doer
Your child hears a knock on the door. He asks "Who is it?"
If the knock is strong, He knows that the person who knocked is either a man, someone who's angry, someone who's in a hurry, etc.
He's able to describe the doer although he hasn't see him. This is something ingrained in our فطرة.
-> Why?
The child asks why, because in his فطرة, he knows that there should be a purpose and a reason behind everything.
People are always searching for the purpose of their existence in life.
-> الجزاء (The Recompense)
If someone hurts him, he'll come to you complaining and crying because he believes in recompense; He wants you to take his right from that person.
-> He's always searching for who the first is, what the beginning of everything is
The child asks the mother, "Who brought me into life?"
The mother says, "I did"
He asks, "Who brought you?"
She says, "My mother"
He asks, "Who brought your mother?"
And this sequence goes on, because this child wants to go back to the first.
Tell him that Allah brought him into existence, and this sequence will stop. He may ask you, "Who created Allah?"
You have to tell him, "Allah is the First, there's nothing before Him" and repeat this every time he asks about Allah. And he'll accept your answer without argumentation.
If he asks you where he's from, and you lie to him and say he's from the Baqalah, he'll believe you.
-> He's always searching for the greatest one.
Children fear. They feel this weakness, so they seek a strong one who can protect them. And their فطرة dictates that this that this great, strong one, should be high and above everything - otherwise He isn't great.
That's why you see superman and other characters coming from the sky. And that's why we find our children's hearts attached to them.
When your child asks you for a superman costume, know that this part of his فطرة has been distorted, because his heart is attached to that. No one told him that Allah is great, so he looked for the great one, and found it on the television - such that later, when you tell him that Allah is great, he'll say, "Well is He greater than superman?"
Instead of magnifying Allah, these characters are magnified.
Allah placed these characteristics in the nature of humans for you to use it to teach your child who Allah is. The child looks around him in the universe; he sees the sun, moon, stars, sky, birds, animals. He's lost. He's looking for the answers to his questions. And if you don't fill this space of questions with the correct answers, other people will hasten towards him and fill that space with wrong beliefs.
Before cartoons and non-Muslims teachers distort his فطرة, be the person who fills this space and answers all his questions, because they'll be filled and answered by someone sooner or later. It's dangerous to keep your child in front of the television, because he's absorbing answers for all the doubts he has, while you're completely unaware what's happening to him. The effect of this is seen when he becomes a teenager.
Before anything you need to learn about Allah, His names, attributes, and actions. It's because of our ignorance that our children are ignorant as well.
And keep talking to your child about the actions of Allah; keep telling him that the doer is Allah.
Three Steps to Follow
1) Activate the فطرة by Raising Questions
Say, "Son, do you see this?"
2) Give him time to think
3) But be the one who answers
This is based on a Hadith:
عن أبي ذر أن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم كان جالساً ، وشاتان تقترنان ، فنطحت إحداهما الأخرى فأجهضتهاة
It was narrated from Abu Dharr that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ was sitting, and two sheep locked horns until one of them defeated and subdued the other.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
يا أبا ذر ! هل تدري فيم تنتطحان ؟
قال : لا
قال : لكن الله يدري ، وسيقضي بينهما
"O Abu Dharr, do you know what they are fighting over?”
He said, “No.”
He ﷺ said, “But Allah knows and He will judge between them.”
This Hadith also teaches us to use the events that happen around us to teach our children. There's no need to sit down and give lectures to children. Use the situation to bring to his attention who Allah is.
E.g. He loves a cat. Say, "Son, Allah created this cat" everyday.
You're teaching him who Allah is, using the part of his فطرة which dictates that every action has a doer. This is your only job when your child is young.
E.g. Your child likes milk. You say, "Do you know where this milk is from?"
He might stay silent and think, or say "The Cow", etc,
Say, "Allah created the cow, and Allah gave you the milk"
Tell him a story every night. The story of the bread, or milk, for example.
The bread was flour, the flour came from a plant, the plant from a seed, the seed from Allah, the ground is created by Allah, the water from the sky is from Allah, until it becomes a tree or plant by Allah.
Attribute every stage to Allah. So who gave you the bread? Allah gave you the bread.
And repeat the same story every night. Children never get tired of repetition. If you accidentally mess up the words, they'll be the one to tell you that you made a mistake.
Especially when the child is 3-4 years old. Don't add information or change the words.
If you say, "Allah is in the heavens" don't add information the next time around and say, "Allah is in the heavens up above his throne"
We think our children are stupid, unintelligent, and can't grasp information. But we're the ignorant ones. The child asks repeatedly to affirm the answer in his heart. So don't change your answer until he absorbs it, then start adding more information.
If you repeat this way of education, this child will grow up loving Allah and no one else.
Many people think young children are too young to comprehend. But they're so intelligent. They can read your face. They know if what you're telling them comes from your heart or not.
2) المستحسنات
These are things which your child's nature accepts as good
E.g. He loves good actions, good morals, good doers. He loves whoever does good to him. That's why you have children who love their nannies more than their mothers. His فطرة tells him to love whoever does good to him.
So when you tell him that Allah gives, Allah provides, Allah cures, then he will love Allah.
And his فطرة tells him the good doer has to be thanked. And he will be very upset if he does good and you thank or reward someone else - because he believes in الجزاء. He loves justice.
3) المستقبحات
These are things which are ugly to your child
He hates oppression. If he sees someone beating another person, he won't come close to that person. If he sees someone attacking his mother, he cries.
So be careful with your actions in front of your children. Hitting and yelling in front of them will psychologically affect them.
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