In [8:63]:
There is no guidance like the guidance of the Qur'an.
Allah is the One who puts love and the feelings in the hearts. In [19:96]:
He united their hearts - such that when you feel sad, I feel sad, you feel happy, I feel happy. And they're all content and tranquil. This is a Paradise.
Even if you spent all the money, you would never be able to unite the hearts. This is the عزة of Allah.
In the four emotions we discussed, there's no love. Love is the result of all these balanced emotions. You love Allah, and you love everyone and everything for the sake of Allah. That is the connection of the hearts, which Allah puts in the hearts of the believers, although their natures are different.
The four basic emotions are:
1) الحزن - Sadness
2) الخوف - Fear
3) الغضب - Anger
4) الفرح - Happiness
We can't eliminate these emotions, but we need to balance them. And no one can tell you how to balance it except your creator. Even we don't know exactly who we are - with time we understand ourselves. In [67:14]:
We have emotions for two reasons:
1) As a test
2) To worship Allah by them
Sadness
We can't deny this feeling, but we need to ask ourselves if our sadness is worth it. If it's not, delete it. Its our responsibility to have a نفس مطمئنة.
If it's worth it, you need to direct it to Allah. The solution is in knowing Allah.
All of the names of Allah balance a person in his sadness.
If you are sad about provision, Allah is الرزاق
If you are sad about guidance, Allah is الهادي
If you are sad about the means, Allah is الأول و الآخر
Fear - الخوف
We feel the first feeling of fear as soon as we're born. That's why babies come out crying, not smiling. They're leaving the womb of their mother - their comfort zone. And the Shaytan pinches every baby that's born, symbolic of his enmity.
" مَا مِنْ بَنِي آدَمَ مَوْلُودٌ إِلاَّ يَمَسُّهُ الشَّيْطَانُ حِينَ يُولَدُ، فَيَسْتَهِلُّ صَارِخًا مِنْ مَسِّ الشَّيْطَانِ...."
Abu Huraira said, "I heard Allah's Messenger ﷺ saying, 'There is none born among the off-spring of Adam, but Satan touches it. A child therefore, cries loudly at the time of birth because of the touch of Satan..."
The feeling of fear continues with a human through his life.
Why do we feel afraid? It's an instinct that protects you from danger. Allah gave us this feeling as an alarm, so that we don't put ourselves in harms way. In [2:195]:
What are some things that causes us to feel afraid? We fear loss, separation, darkness, poverty, the Shaytan, old age, the Hellfire, an evil ending, loneliness, your husband marrying another woman, your job, Magic, فتنة, the Dajjal, losing weight, gaining weight, etc.
Your fear depends on who you are. Some hate being in the dark, others enjoy it.
Write down your fears. Put it aside. When we discuss fears in the Qur'an, then assess whether your fears are worth wasting your energy on or not.
1) The Fear of Musa عليه السلام in the Qur'an
He was a strong person, but Allah mentioned that he felt fear many times in the Qur'an. This isn't something bad. Don't think that men don't get afraid. Fear is mostly attributed to men in the Qur'an, while sadness to ladies. They don't show it, but mostly your husband isn't sad about the past, but about the future - about the children, education, money, provision, security etc. As if he's the security of the house, because fear is for security.
a) When escaping the city after accidentally killing a person
In the eyes of the people you committed a crime, although you're innocent. He was afraid of the punishment. This is a valid reason.
When he left, and when to Madyan, the father of the two girls said in [28:25]:
b) When his stick turned into a snake
In [20:21]:
And in [28:31]:
His stick was something he was familiar with, and it turned into something harmful. Then he had to face his fear, to not just come forward, but to come forward and take the snake.
Notice the fear of Pharoah made Musa escape, and when he did, he wasn't ordered to go back.
But when he feared the snake, Allah told him to face his fear.
Why?
If there's a fire, you can't tell someone to jump into it and face his fear. If a lion comes you're not supposed to be strong and face it. Of if there's a war or a plague in a certain country, don't go. Because these are real things. Listen to your fear when it's regarding real matters. Allah gave us fear to fear the hellfire, the punishments, the فتنة of the end of times, of dying in a bad end, bad companions, poverty, laziness, heedlessness, Shirk, etc. If you want to know what the real fears are look at the دعاء's which start with "أعوذ". Every thing we seek refuge with Allah from are real fears.
But the snake was just a phobia, not a valid reason to be afraid. It wouldn't harm him, it just appeared scary. It wasn't a real fear.
People have all kinds of phobias nowadays - of public speaking, traveling on a plane, of heights, etc.
Don't be scared of ants, cockroaches. We get overly scared of everything, afraid of things our parents weren't afraid of. And this drains our energy for no reason. If you have a phobia, go forward and face it. Control your fears because otherwise it'll weaken you.
In [27:10]:
Musa عليه السلام immediately ran away when he saw the snake. Allah trained him - you're a Messenger, don't be afraid.
An engineer can't be afraid of heights, a doctor shouldn't be afraid of blood.
And none of the other Messengers get afraid with Allah - this gives you courage, because it's not just you, it's everyone.
We need to use our feelings to worship and attach ourselves to Allah. And don't fear things which haven't even happened yet, they're just وسواس. Fear about the future will just chain you down.
c) Fear of Facing Pharoah
In [20:45]:
He was scared that Pharoah might kill him or become even worse than before. He wasn't afraid of Pharoah himself. You need to eliminate fear before you confront a tyrant, an enemy, or someone who has power.
How do I overcome this fear?
In Verse 46:
For both sadness and fear, remember that Allah is with you.
Sometimes we unnecessarily get afraid of things and what people will say. And when we do, Allah will put us through a situation where we have to face this fear. If you're scared of a fly, that fly will come to you. If you're scared of seeing a person, you'll see them. Allah wants you to face your unimportant fear - to teach you that it's nothing.
The characteristic of the believers is that they're not afraid of people blaming them. In [5:54]:
All the nonsensical fears we feel will spoil our lives. We need to filter out emotions, and take out all the wrong ones and balance out all the valid ones.
Are you afraid of the blame of the blamers? That people will think this, and say that? If you are afraid of it, you won't struggle and strive hard in Allah's path. You won't be productive. You'll just be worried about what people say. Get this out of your system.
d) When the Magicians threw down their Sticks
In [20:66-68]:
When you confront disbelief, and it appears attractive and strong, don't be afraid. As long as you're on the truth, you'll be superior
e) When Pharoah was chasing Bani Israeel
In [20:77]:
Allah told Musa عليه السلام what to do. Do the aforementioned, and don't be afraid - Allah will support Him.
2) The Fear of Ibrahim عليه السلام
a) When the Angels didn't eat from the food
In [51:28]:
In [11:70]:
If a person didn't eat food during his time, it meant that he came for something evil. The Angels immediately identified themselves, and clarified. If someone's afraid and there's no reason to be, you need to clarify.
b) When he was thrown into the Fire
In [21:68-69]:
This story is an example of Tawakkul. Being afraid of fire is something natural in every human being. The solution for fear is Tawakkul. A person who relies on Allah won't fear anything.
3) The Fear of Dawud عليه السلام
In [38:22]:
Someone unexpectedly walked in. We learn to not scare people from this.
4) The Fear of Lut عليه السلام
In [29:33]:
We have sadness and fear over here. Sadness about the past, and fear of the future.
Allah told him exactly about everything that's going to happen to remove this fear.
5) The Fear of the Prophet ﷺ - Fear of Betrayal
In [8:58]:
If you're afraid that someone will betray you, then free yourself from the contract or agreement. Why constantly be worried, and put spying systems in your house, etc. Don't betray the person back, just release the contract.
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